Friday, August 29, 2008

BlissQuest: Slowing Down, Changing Seasons, & Remembering

Waning Corn Moon high in the sky, late in the morning.

Listening to: In this, you can appreciate her voice more than usual.

Today's Bliss: My writing space is cleaner. I was being threatened by mountains of papers! Little bits of paper, large pieces of paper, all covered with ideas and imperatives and imaginings.

The weather is changing -- or at least, it momentarily seems as if it is. Some very fall-like temperatures with wind and gray sky. My joints feel the cool wet, and they creak, as they do at the transition times, those few weeks when summer cannot decide to give over to fall or spring cannot let go of winter.

And maybe this weather is an explanation for my mood.

I am beginning to look forward to the shutting of the windows and doors. The better to hear my own thoughts.

I am beginning to look forward to putting the garden to bed. The easier it will be to rest my own bones.

I am beginning to look forward to the stillness that comes after a foot of snow blankets the earth. The deeper I will be able to enter my heart.

But I wonder why it takes fall and winter for this to be the case?

Why can't I remember all year long that it is in doing things deliberately that I find peace and balance?

Summer makes me frenetic. Like the sun, I become too intense and focused on doing. Like thunder storms, I am all energy and movement.

Then, suddenly (or not), it is September, and I wonder why I feel so out of sorts. I start craving a vacation. A going away and being different.

When really, I need to stay where I am, sit still, and be different right here.

I need to stop doing things out of some sense of obligation. Which is where I end up every summer -- saying yes to every invitation, trying to squeeze in too many people and places and events, taking on too many projects.

I want to feel productive, not rushed. They are so different. I want to have a morning ritual and not have it feel like something I have to check off my To-Do list. The same for yoga and writing in my journal and taking slow walks.

But they all start to feel like obligatory goals because I am trying to pack in too many things for the sake of others, for the sake of being busy during this beautiful weather.

I have a feeling I am not alone in my "Summer Sickness." I have a feeling that a lot of people suffer from this sickness year round. Not being able to differentiate between what matters to them and what doesn't really matter at all.

What are some of the things you are doing and wish you weren't?

What do you put on the back burner that really needs to have its place front and center in your life?

Do you have any daily rituals or tricks or reminders that keep you on the path of your bliss?

5 comments:

carlikup said...

Wow Christine! You are one of the most insightful person that I have come across in a very very long time. Reading your blogs is true spiritual work ~ serious spiritual work ~ difficult spiritual work.

You wonder why it takes fall and winter to hear your own thoughts and why you can't do this deliberately all year long ~
because you are an extremely spiritual and nature connected individual. Learning how to juggle that is difficult!

I felt the same this summer ~ very focused & intense. But then I reaized that I needed a little winter break earlier than expected. Usually I would of just went on and on the whole summer~ but I am now learning to listen to myself and to follow my biorythms; it's been a long, hard process, but I'm slowly getting there :0)

megg said...

This is a wonderful post! I SO GET IT!! What do I need to let go of? The question makes me panic so obviously there is something! As for what needs to come front and center - it's my own health, my own body, my own rhythm. It's been trying to get my attention for weeks - and I think I am going to try to listen.
Thank you!

differenceayearmakes said...

I live in Florida where the seasons are very subtle if they exist at all. For instance leaves don't fall from the trees around here till January. We have hot and humid summer (hurricane season from first of June till end of November) and an almost winter where it doesn't get quite as hot and it might actually get cold, but rarely cold enough for more then a light jacket (the remaining months) and if we are lucky have a few days of weather that we can call autumn and spring.

Not having seasons means you don't actually have these time markers. You have to make your own. I have begun to follow the moon cycles - the night sky changes, certainly the constellations do change here as everywhere else.

There are markers in the year, for example: I'm currently looking forward to theatre season which runs from November thru May; and strawberry season in February/March.

I began this project capturing the seasons on my blog, but haven't kept up with it for the summer, not a whole lot changed. I'll continue this project for two years - because I'm determined to capture what does change throughout the year in Florida. And you know what, I find that it is very hard to pay attention. So much I take for granted. And that I'm trying to change.

Lisa B said...

Miss Blisschick, I have been meaning to tell you how much I love your blog, and this beautiful entry today is a perfect impetus to jump in and say thanks, for today's inspiration as well as every other days'.
You are a real spirit warrior. Thank you for writing every single darned day - oh the discipline!! Since finding your blog a few weeks back, I have been reading it first thing on the computer instead of any other inspirational reading - you ARE my inspirational reading every day. Always much food for thought, much joy, much life.
Also you give us so MUCH to contemplate, not only with your ideas and musings, but the music and the fantastic photos.
And PS I love love love your partner's art. Tell her it is absolutely gorgeous and delightful both.
Thanks for this wonderful blog and all the effort and love that goes into it.

Lisa said...

Doing & wish I wasn't = obsessing over a current someone with whom I'm in a relationship.

Back burner stuff = 1) daily spiritual practice and 2) steps toward financial security

Bliss check = return to my breath and pray the welcoming prayer. (And then laugh at how darned seriously I take myself and life way toooo much of the time!)