Tuesday, August 25, 2009

Twelve Results of Being True to Your Passion

Over the past many weeks, I must say...I am amazing myself!

I have now written and deleted just about three sentences trying to explain to you that I am not being conceited, and I am going to stop right there. Why do I feel compelled to do that?

It's true: I am amazing myself! (Now let it be, Christine!)

Something has shifted this year and it is beyond amazing and I am allowed to feel good about that.

I have worked my whole life to get to this point and I am going to own it and enjoy it.

What point have I gotten to, you ask? I am finally, finally, finally doing what I am meant to do.

I am dancing!

About fifteen years ago, I pretty much hung up my dancing shoes, and I started doing yoga, telling myself that it was a better movement model for aging. What? I was twenty five when I started saying this.

But two days ago, while doing a particularly wonderful dance workout, I had an epiphany.

I am not a yogi (though I will always do yoga and pursue its spiritual truths, don't get me wrong). I just mean that is no my primary identification.

Nope. I am a dancer! And I am yelling that loud and proud. My body loves dance. My body wants and needs dance. My body is dance.

It happened while I was lifting some small weights and warming up. I was supposed to then do a yoga routine. I could feel every fiber of my being resisting and I knew I could not face getting on that mat; I just wanted to dance. So that's what I did and then the epiphany came. Marcy came in and saw how my body was working and started to cry because she could see the epiphany.

Dance is my path, and for some reason...no, because of fear, fifteen years ago, I attempted to sublimate that into yoga. You can't do this. You must do what you were born to do.

I was born to write and to dance. Period.

Now, with this realization, I noticed some things about myself that have changed because of this doing what I was born to do. My body and heart had this epiphany weeks and weeks ago, of course, and my brain was just doing some catch-up.

I noticed some things that I think would apply to anyone. These are things that happen to your life when you admit and give in to your passion:

1. There is no not doing it. Resistance still exists. There are days when I internally whine about the sweating and the moving, but I do it anyway. And there is no doubt in my body that I will. My mind might be talkin' trash, but my body and heart know that it's full of crap.

2. As soon as I start dancing (as soon as you start "fill in the blank"), everything else just falls away. I am in the flow; I am the flow. There is nothing else. I am completely in the Now. There is no such thing as time or effort. My being and doing become one.

3. This joy permeates the rest of my life. It's as though I have finally met myself and with that comes this immense well of confidence.

4. I feel brave. Also from the confidence. I am a dancer, hear me roar.

5. I no longer have time for bullshit. I have stuff to do and it's important.

6. I no longer have time for negative people. I no longer have the need to be negative myself because I'm not hiding from myself so I'm not angry.

7. I am attracting a different sort of friendship into our lives now. Suddenly, we notice that there are all these people we know who are growers rather than destroyers.

8. I wake up energetic and ready to go.

9. As a friend of ours just said to us during a visit, "I feel like I am really living." Yep. Exactly.

10. Ravi Singh and Ana Brett like to say "feel like you can do one more...forever." That used to make me so freaking mad! But now, I get it. And I do feel like that. Whether with writing or dance, I feel like I can just go and go and go.

11. I am swimming in an ocean ideas and possibility.

12. Trusting that things will work out is coming so much more easily. Risk taking does not feel life threatening.

Now this may all sound like I am experiencing some sort of mania, except that I'm not, and how do I know this?

Because not only am I more myself but I am also still just myself. I am still a rather serious little animal with a tendency toward (cute, according to Marcy) grouchy-osity.

I am Me and More Me all at the same time.

What an adventure I have ahead of me!

How about you? What dream are you hiding from? You know the answer. It just popped into your head!

(Photo & Text Copyright: Christine C. Reed, blisschick.net, 2009)


svasti said...

You know how you're expected to know what you want to do with your life when you're getting ready to leave high school and go on to uni/college and/or some other training?

Well I never did.

Most of my life I never did, either.

Its only recently that my future has started revealing itself to me. I'm not 100% sure I know what the deal is yet, but I know enough parts of it to feel how even knowing that much can change the direction of my life.

Like a gravitational pull.

I had a big grin on my face reading this post! How exciting for you. I can't wait to see what you do with this new knowledge as it brings more and more light into your already bright and shiny life :)

Emma said...

Christine, don't worry. We see it, too. You are AMAZING us, as well!

Beautiful post! I'm so happy for you. :)

Sue said...

What an adorable post! Dance, you Blissy Chick, until you need to sit down and have a wee rest :)

I can say with delight that I am following lots of dreams these days :) There is more of me, absolutely. And yet there are always more dreams and when I asked myself about what dream am I hiding from, there is possibly one that I am. And that is, you might be quite squeaked to know, dancing :) I don't dance in public, and never have. When I was a teenager and we all went to the pub to get smashed, and all the girls danced with their handbags in a circle in the middle, by the time I was 17 or 18 I had hung up my shoes and stayed sitting down while the others did their thing. I started doing yoga not long after that, heh :)

And yet, when I write, dancing as a metaphor comes up. I say I wanna salsa. I did dance, a little bit ago, in the lounge room all by myself, balancing that root chakra :) And I was quite flush faced about it all afterward :)

Linnea said...

I have tears of joy stinging my eyes. That's how much YOUR joy shines through your post.

And you and Marcy? Best. Couple. Ever. You're so wonderfully supportive of each other.

You inspire me, lady.

holly said...

Yes this is so refreshing to read! I have many passions in life, but the main ones are DANCE, art creativity and nutrition. i love dancing so much, and its so good to read someone saying "YES IAM AMAZING" - in our society we are taught to feel guilty when we are happy for no reason, or when we feel amazing. and its nice to read what you've written because it gives us permission to feel it to....x

Lauren said...

I love, love, LOVE this post. Not only did it make me wonderfully happy for you, it also came at a perfect time for me as well. Thank you so much for sharing--and keep on dancing!


Bohemian Single Mom said...

Yay for you!
I LOVE this post, and it is doing wonders for my own self/passion.
I love your affirmations.
I love how your mind is soaking up so much stimuli now that you're not denying your dream any more.
You totally ROCK...seriously.

Tabitha@ichoosebliss.net said...

I'm so joyful for you! You inspire us and although I may not comment everyday please know that I visit/read EVERYDAY. :)

sherry ♥ lee said...

Isn't it wonderful when you become who you are fully and wholly? I'm blissfully happy for you!!!!

differenceayearmakes said...

Oh Christine I am so very very happy for you! How exciting is this! Own all your joy, revel in your joy and share your joy! This is how you change the world - you find your own true gift and let it shine.

Bonzai Beadwear said...

How good for you! Its wonderful that you are back to your passion of dance!! What an inspiring post :)

Mon said...

YAY!!!! Hi there, came over from your Follow. Loving your ords and blog.

Can't believe we have such similar posts up today!
And I LOVE dancing. Not serious formal stuff but just losing myself to a beat.

Love #5. So there right now.

Yes, more ME, yes and yes.

Rowena said...

Thanks to you and some other tweeters, I did some dancing today. It felt really good and broke some things open, I think.

But I also learned something. I can not go at that speed, dancing and making muffins and playing games with little kids all day without some serious crashing.

Hmm. There's a reason my life is kind of sedate, and it's because I have and have always had low energy.

But I also accepted that and did not feel guilty when I lost my temper and lost my energy. I just rode with it.

And as for that thing I should be doing... well, I have multiple novels waiting for my attention. And writing makes me happy.

I paint and paint and I really love it, but writing fills that other thing.

Grace said...

funny you should be writing about dance today as today I posted about starting an abunDANCE Movement! This scares me a bit--what if no one joins?


alisha said...

lovely post. thank you for sharing this. i really needed to read this today!

Lisa said...

This is wonderful!!!

I'm SO happy for you!

You're quite an inspiration for those of us still putting the pieces together, doing the healing work, and reclaiming our true, dreaming selves.

Tee said...

Blessings for your bliss and finding your truth! Isn't it AMAZING!?!

tinkerbell the bipolar faery said...

I have recently discovered that now + 1 = now ... and so on to infinity and beyond. There is only now. We only have now.

And you savour it with your whole being. The light is where you walk, Christine.

Laurina said...

Just inspirational, thank you! This is the only blog I have ever read and I cannot wait to open my mail each day to see what you've posted...love it!

Artist Jennifer Swiderski said...

OH! I actually cried. My soul is deeply happy for you, and Marcy. may you both continue to be blessed. you both inspire me. the lives you live, your courage, and your transformations. go go go! and know many are with you.
hugs love and blessings!

claire bangasser said...

Bravo! Great post!

Jeanette said...

Just discovered your blog through wish studio and I'm loving it. It's funny to read this, as I just said to my partner the other night that I so wanted to find time and money to dance again, that it is one thing that I know makes me happy and is such a part of me, and it's the one thing I have not made time for in almost ten years.

Thanks for being another reminder of what I already know. Looking forward to reading more.


lynn @ human, being said...

Wow, I had the same epiphany a few years ago after trading dance for yoga. Then I found salsa dancing and discovered that i LOVE it. And now dance 2-3 times a week, and even perform.

Yes, I'm 40 and no, I can't do the splits or triple pirouettes en pointe anymore, but I am a GREAT salsa dancer because I put so much joy into it.

I learned then that my life is incomplete when I am not dancing. So I dance because I must.

Tasmin said...

Super amazing revelation today. Empowering for me...nearly to motivational tears. I appreciate your desire intensely. I appreciate your growth and am inspired.