Tuesday, December 1, 2009

BlissObstacles: Picking Up Other People's Crap

Almost a month ago, I put out a call for submissions from all you Blisschicks and Wild Women to write for this little site. I got some great responses and will be posting them this week.

For guidelines, go here.

I'll start taking submissions again from now until January 5th for the next prompt:

On an airplane, they remind you to give yourself
oxygen before worrying about a child or an elderly person.
If you can't breathe, you can't help anyone else.
How do you make sure to give yourself
necessary "oxygen" in your day to day life?

Remember, check the guidelines that I linked to above.

Today's Guest Blogger

Today, we have the first post answering our first prompt which was:

What is the main difficulty you have encountered in trying to craft a life of bliss? What have you tried to do about this?

Sallieann started writing her blog, Bunny Bites, when she was struggling to remain a vegetarian while traveling for her job. It's packed with recipes and all sorts of Yumminess and is completely Rabbit Approved (thus the photo of Miss Zoe at the top). She wrote the following:

Wikipedia describes bliss as, "a state of profound spiritual satisfaction, happiness or joy, often associated with religious ideas of the afterlife." Most of the time I nail this pretty well. I describe myself as a deeply happy person, but I'm also sensitive...super-sensitive. And although I might be having a grand day, I pick up on other people's unhappiness or frustration and it easily knocks me down a notch or two.

This has happened a few times this week. I had a yoga accident Saturday, leaving me unable to go to a Halloween party I'd been excited about all the prior week. Then I smashed my toe on Wednesday, which led to a trip to the emergency room. Through all of this, I was surprisingly up-beat with a few exceptions. All exceptions had to do with close friends who are going through challenging times. Instead of giving them space to sort themselves out...maybe offering a few kind words and then waiting for them to reach out, I jump right in with them and wallow around. It drains me and I need to stop.

So, I recommit myself to morning meditation and a bit of sweaty yoga to purge my soul. And I end each and every day in bed with my gratitudes. And I remind myself, that right here and right now...in this very state and body and mind...this is exactly where I'm supposed to be on my wonderful and exciting journey. And then I hunker down, peep out over the covers and wonder what's going to happen next!

Can any of you relate to this issue? I certainly can!

How do you deal with it?


City Girl said...

I love this post - it is so true that we can get sucked into other's people negativity.

Eco Yogini said...

ohhhh so true.

I am exactly the same way.

haven't really sorted out how to keep this to a minimum yet... when friends need to talk about their challenges I'm usually hardpressed to keep my distance.

but then, I've been working hard to not seek it out if it's not asked. :)

Jessica said...

Yes, hi, this is so me. Judith Orloff calls it being 'empathetic' and it IS draining.

I figured out that this is why I need solitude so much. And I have to remind myself: 'this is their anxiety. Their fear. Their stress.' And that helps. But nothing helps like solitude, preferably in a dark room.

But it's difficult for me to hold the line between witnessing and becoming emotionally involved.

Oh, the holidays...

- Jessica

Anonymous said...

This is so true for most of us "co-dependants"...the thing I pray about every day...learn to let go and let be...is very difficult.