Monday, April 12, 2010

To Car or Not To Car


(A scented narcissus that is one of my favorites in our front yard)


On Friday, I wrote about how much living my bliss has been changing every part of my life from big to small.

Dancing has brought me back to my center, the essence of who I am. Depression and anxiety no longer hold me in their cold and deadly grip. This is not to say that I am forever released from the possibility of their return, but now I have an awareness of their ways and the tools to banish them that I never had before.

It is still an every single day set of choices that brings me to happiness and joy and peace and purpose and passion.

Dancing has changed my relationship to my body -- how I feel about it, how I utilize it, how I energize it, how I fuel it.

Those are some of the big things that have changed and that continue to change as I learn to navigate through these calmer, bluer, warmer waters.

Onto a smaller thing which really isn't that small, not really, but it is minuscule when compared to overcoming debilitating depression.

To Car or Not To Car...that has been the most recent question. I got a lot of wonderful feedback to this perplexing issue. Truly helpful stuff out there. On this blog, in emails, in person. We are surrounded by thoughtful, caring people who are capable of some excellent critical thinking.

I want to thank everyone for contributing to the dialogue.

We have our decision.

On Saturday, I had this amazing and eye opening discussion with a wonderful woman. I currently teach one day out of her yoga studio, but this is going to change. This yoga studio is very close to home. Close enough to walk in really bad weather.

And now that I know how much she and I are on the same page about a multitude of exciting things, I feel relaxed about the car issue.

I know we don't need it.

I know the money would be better used toward more training so that I might grow as a dancer and instructor. Someday, I hope the money will be better used toward opening a new and bigger studio.

These are the kinds of choices I am talking about here all the time.

Most of us cannot "have it all." A lot of us don't even want what "have it all" means.

The main thing I want in this life is to be able to do the thing that brings me not just happiness but deep and abiding peace and sanity.

For that, I am willing to sacrifice what is essentially, for us, an issue of convenience. For now. Sometimes the same decisions need to be made day after day, month after month, year after year...


9 comments:

Eco Yogini said...

Congratulations on your decision! It sounds like you made exactly the right one for you and your family. :)

I'm glad that as dancing has brought yourself into focus, that you made a decision that was inherently YOU.

You're right- you don't need a car. :)

Tess said...

Just back from the garage waiting to hear the verdict on what could be some very expensive repairs to mine, I think you made the right choice.

I know that if I lived somewhere public transport was easy and accessible, I would be car free, and would feel better for it. I would miss some things and life would in some ways be more complicated, but...

Tess said...

I just put a comment on this and as soon as I pushed the publish button I had a bit of an epiphany. I realise that a lot of my resistance to being car free is not wanting to depend on people for lifts. Which translates to my obsession with being independent. Which gives me a lot of food for thought.

claire said...

Bravo, Kiddo! (Please excuse the familiarity). This sounds so much more like you than buying a car.

I admire you vastly for not having had a car for 9 years!

What an example you are for me!

Christine Claire Reed said...

Tess, The main thing we've discovered is how vastly this SIMPLIFIES our lives. Cars complicate in that they, we have found, create "necessity," create activity, busyness.

We never "rely" on others for rides. If we NEED a car, we rent. Which happens to be very, very cheap where we are. Sure, if a friend is going the same place for an event and offers a ride that we think is on their way, we accept. Like I tell people, sharing is part of the solution too! :)

And our public transport SUCKS in little Erie, but Erie IS little, so most of what we do and need is within a three miles radius.

For the U.S. this is not uncommon, as the majority of car rides are statistically under 5 miles. (CRAZY!)

Christine Claire Reed said...

EcoYogini, We'll see...like I said, this is that sort of decision that one has to make over and over. ;)

Claire, The familiarity is more than welcome. :)

Emma said...

In short: Yay!

Lisa said...

Wee!

Isn't is WONDERFUL to have the freedom to allow ourselves to ponder these things and mindfully *choose* how to move forward?

Thank you for sharing the journey through this decision-making process with us, your fortunate readers :)

svasti said...

Even if you'd decided in favour of a car, I wouldn't think any differently of you. As you say, gotta keep working it out. Nothing is forever and yeah, maybe one day you will need a car.

I agree that a car creates "needs" we otherwise don't have. I can't tell you how many places I used to drive my car that I now easily walk or ride my bike to get to. The mind boggles.

And, if I don't have a car, it means I really have to assess if I want to go somewhere and plan for it, right? Sometimes doing less is just better.