Friday, July 2, 2010
Aging & Bravery
(Toby is showing off his beautiful "fresh" teeth. He is only 9 months old and they are very pointy and sparkly. He wants you to know that he is not adverse to using them on you if you continue to hold yourself back in any way from your Life's Big Adventure. He's just sayin'...)
If I let myself, as I have mentioned briefly before, I could get all caught up in a tangle of "what if's" and "why not sooner's" and "what the f'ck's" when it comes to my return to dance last year at the age of 40.
I could, but I am not going to.
First of all, there simply is no point in playing that kind of game. It only leads to despair.
Second, I truly believe there are reasons that things happen the way that they do, and there are so many reasons that I didn't stay in dance from a young age but rather got back to it now.
Though I would never have imagined this for myself, I am happier, healthier, stronger, fitter, more graceful, more creative, more flexible than at any other time in my life. Any. Other. Time.
And I am still improving. I am still only about six months into any kind of serious fitness. What could the next six months hold? Only I can control that.
Yes. It is up to me.
Yesterday, for example, as I was teaching, I could feel a weird little twinge in my left ankle. When I was younger, I would have just ignored this and eventually hurt myself, but as I am wiser (by a wee bit...), I paid attention and adjusted for the ankle's sake. I do not want any serious "down" time.
I have too much to do -- workshops to develop, choreography to experiment with, trainings to attend.
There is no delusion in this: I am making a brand new life for myself and it is centered completely in dance and movement work. I would never have been brave enough to do this at a younger age.
Which brings me to my point: The thing that has developed the most during this process has been my bravery, my utter willingness to put myself on the line and take risks...risks that lead to adventure and a kind of bliss I never knew before.
As Dara Torres says in the title of her memoir, Age is Just a Number, and she should know -- winning Olympic swimming medals in her 40's.
She is my new hero, that's for sure.
Here's the thing I want to know from you all: What have you accomplished or dared to do after the age of 35 or 40 or 55 or 70 that you would never have thought possible before? What has Aging done for you?
(Feel free to leave a comment about this, to email me, or to leave a link in the comments to a post you write about it yourself.)