One of the hardest things to deal with in Complex PTSD for the injured and their loved ones is emotional flashbacks.
Marcy and I have devised a few techniques over the last week or so to awaken me from these free floating pains and anxieties from the past.
First, we have created a safe haven for me in a prayer and meditation space that is dedicated to Mary. I sit there three times a day and ask for help and guidance and strength or to have bad dreams removed or to sleep better...whatever it is that I am needing.
Remember, I am a believer and so this works for me. I think it's super important that everyone who suffers from C-PTSD find something they can believe in besides their pain and their brains.
Second, we have purchased a comfortable blanket that is just mine. This sounds silly, but emotional flashbacks make us feel very small and very unsafe. Having something to hold onto, literally, can help in the worst of times.
And finally, we have come up with the Key Question.
This question would be different for everyone but also very much the same, I think, since Complex PTSD always comes down to feeling unsafe in the present because we are confusing it with the past. Well, our brains are confusing it with the past.
This question is a KEY in that it can unlock our frozen fear and walk us through the door into our current, adult life.
The question that Marcy asks me when it is apparent that I am not present is:
What are you afraid of right now?
We are new to this path, so I know that over time, we will just get better and better at this, and we will be sharing with you as we go.
(Feel free to ask any questions about all of this. Marcy and I would love to help other couples learn to cope.)