Friday, July 1, 2011
The Lies that Underlie the Fear of Happy
When I am in motion like that, there is no fear; there is only the essential happy me.
And then I slow down or sit still...
And the voices of the gremlins start chattering away in my brain.
As I wrote about yesterday, I am working right now with the fear of never being enough, which is a fear based on a lie -- we are always just enough right now.
Another fear that is poking at me is this fear that if I totally relax into my current happy (which is BIG) then something bad will blind side me because I am not paying attention.
This fear is based on a cluster of lies.
Lie Number One: Happiness is not our natural state. Quite the contrary, we are built to be happiness itself, and by happy, I don't mean some manic HIGH. By happy, I mean contentment and peace within ourselves. Happy as in knowing exactly who we are (Universe wrapped in skin) and feeling our real power (to create our lives).
Lie Number Two: The Universe/God/Divinity is cruel. Do you see that in my fear? If I am happy, there is this sense that I will be punished for it.
Lie Number Three: I do not deserve to be totally happy. This is a big one. It is tied into the issue of being enough. It is about our sense of unworthiness. That we are not "good." That we barely deserve to be here, much less to have happy or wonderful in our lives.
Lie Number Four: There are monsters waiting around every corner and you must be vigilant. The truth is there are only monsters where we see them. They are not actually there. We make them appear with our fears.
Now...when I am totally present in my body, none of this is in my mind or heart. Because when you are totally present in the body, you are totally present. Right here. Right now. And in that place, there are no monsters, there are no fears, there are none of these lies.
The solution to this does not reside in the mind. You cannot "un-think" yourself to happiness. As Gabrielle Roth says, you are not going to think yourself out of a problem that is created by the mind to begin with.
What lies and monsters does your mind generate when you give it primacy in your life?